I'm getting hurt repeatedly. Each month, my period comes a week late so I send Tyler off to the store for that infamous test, just to stew for 3 minutes and see negative. Then that day Aunt Flow and Uncle Tom arrive with a "Haha! Tricked you!" Slap to the face.
Everyone is getting pregnant or having babies and it so hard for me to want to congratulate them, when here I am, trying and waiting and nothing happens. Then I have to hear some people complain about how they hate being pregnant and everything. I just want to deck them.
All I want is to have myself a precious little baby girl with my ginger hair, blue eyes, and the Johnson nose, and to have Tyler's eyelashes, and bodacious booty (one day of course for that one, haha.)
I know in my heart that there is a little baby girl out there waiting to be ours. I just wish I knew why I have to go through such a delay.
Sorry if I had hurt any of you. I wrote this all with tears in my eyes. I feel it's unfair. I know I lack patience, a major flaw of mine, but I truly feel that it should be her time to make an appearance. I'd love to be her 9 months of shelter and love as we'd bond together.
I'm discouraged, and I don't know how to get past it.
